We hear a lot about “letting go” of Toxic people, situations and things in our life. However, what we don’t discuss is what are “Toxic People” and How do they affect our energy in a negative way and how does it keep us from reaching for success?
Many people who find themselves on the path of the Occult have experienced or will experience these Toxicities in their life at some point. We hear many “experienced Witches” talk about balance, healing, letting go, and so on. What the hell are they talking about?
Let me tell you a story about a woman who is not far from reaching the Crone stage of her life.
She was born in a Christian Home. On the outside of the home, no one suspected that this large family of five children and two parents living in the home was so full of toxicity from generations of abuse. Although all of the first four children experienced abuse in one form or another, the one this story is about was child number four being more than five years younger than girl number 3 and more than 2 years older than girl number 5.
For whatever reason, the family didn’t want another girl. They wanted a boy. Although she was definitely a little girl, one of the most significant mind-screws for her was that they treated her like the little boy she never was. Always in pants, rarely in a dress, boy toys, and boy rules, don’t hit girls and such. They told everyone she was a “Tom Boy”. They even told her that. They created a story for her that wasn’t remotely hers at all.
She was abused by her parents in various ways, her older siblings were hateful to her. Her grandmother, Aunts, and Cousins were abusive too. She hadn’t even reached kindergarten yet when she first started speaking out about the abuse. The story the abusers told was that she was a liar, had an active imagination, had “mental problems” and also labeled the “trouble maker”.
Grandma, Auntie, and Cousins all spread stories about her to isolate her from playing with the other children. The children liked her more than the little sister and cousins until the stories were told. Not even true stories. That never changed. As she grew up, she was told she was not smart enough to deserve to go to school, she will never amount to anything because she is stupid and crazy and a liar. This child grew up with never being believed when she spoke out about the abuse. She learned that when she told the truth she was accused of lying and when she made up stuff, the fake stuff was more believable. So, She learned how to create acceptable stories. She realized she could tell all her secrets and no one would ever suspect they were true.
Then, One day, after she moved out of the childhood home, she continued to choose manipulative people who would continue to abuse her and keep the story her family gave her going strong. One Day, after her 40th birthday, the universe decided to change things up for her. She wasn’t doing it for herself, so, the Universe stepped in and when the Universe decides to “change” things up, it can be a rough ride. Much like being thrown into the ocean and being expected to sink or swim.
It took many years of heartache, grief, life lessons, and loss in every sense of the word for her to finally understand, what and who the toxic people were. They were her family. Her relatives, her ex, and yes, even one of her children. It wasn’t until her 49th birthday was approaching and the year she became extremely ill. So ill that she was debilitated.It was then she really began to see the truth. For the first 6 months, she kept her illness a secret from most everyone. She began to realize that the people who surrounded her, the people she loved and so desperately wanted them to love her back, was the toxicity in her life that was literally killing her. They began to get careless, she began to see them for what they were. Horrible, Toxic, poisonous, abusive, manipulators who were indeed very clever.
Toxic people tear you down. They do everything they can to destroy and break your spirit. Then, They convince you that you are the “crazy one”. They set out to destroy your mental health by isolating you, destroying your reputation, destroying any sense of self-worth, personal value as a human being, and no matter how much you try to convince yourself that you have a value of any kind, they keep trying to keep that negative self-view going. They are very good at deception. They even convince you it is your own idea to self-hate, and even bring you to the point of suicide.
This “toxic” influence creates negative feelings, negative self-talk that creates negative energy and when you’re spiritually sick, your mind is not healthy, and all that toxic negativity encompasses your entire fiber of being, it definitely affects your physical health. The Whole Mind, Body, and Spirit theory made perfect sense. For this woman, it had grown beyond healing herself. Remember the post I wrote? Witch Heal thyself.
Well, first, before you can begin to heal, it is necessary to identify exactly what is making you sick. Right? Before you can solve a problem you have to admit there is a problem. Then you have to identify the problem before you can treat the problem. Then you can create the solution. When toxic people are a part of your world, your life, your existence, the result can be so negative and destructive that it actually kills your own personal power to reach for success. To believe in yourself, and to ever heal yourself without help.
Finally, This woman kicked every single toxic person out of her world. Cut them off. They could no longer reach her physically, through cyberspace and other sources of media. They lost all control of how she saw herself. She struggled alone for a while but then decided to reach out. She asked for help from someone that was so far away the poisonous toxic negativity couldn’t reach them.
Yes, a fellow empath, magick user, pagan and spiritual ally and friends. This group began the healing process spiritually, now that the toxic people were no longer an influence. She met others who were also healing resources. After the spiritual healing began, her medical treatment and overall well-being began to make progress and even began therapy for healing the mind.
Her physical health began to improve and her healing is still ongoing, but every day she gets stronger. Not only is she healing spiritually, mentally and physically but the universe is bringing more positive situations, people, and experiences into her life. For the first time, she has seen that she actually has the ability to attain success and is learning that not only can she reach out for that success but it is within her reach.
So, as we can see, Toxic people, create negative energy that prevents us from reaching for Success and when we find that no matter how hard we try and struggle for success, it eludes us, it is important to take a look at our lives from a different perspective and know when to ask for help. We are humans, we are here to help when we can and receive help when we need it.
It is not easy to “Let Go” of familiar toxic people, toxic energy or even feel we deserve to reach for success. The reason in many pagan cultures there is a God/dess of destruction and a God/dess of creation is because first the old that no longer serves us must be destroyed before we can build anything new.
In Love and Light and healing might,
May blessings for you be in sight.
Update to this story…
After removing all the toxic people from my life, getting rid of their toxic energy has helped me to get rid of my own toxic thoughts, feelings, and self-imposed constraints. I have been healing in many ways since. As painful as it may be to “let go” of toxic and detrimental people, habits, resentments, and regrets, I can say through experience that finally reaching the place in one’s life to truly let go, is the most empowering thing anyone can do. Today, I am strong enough to move forward and achieve my goals and gain success in reaching them. Goal number one, Letting go of what is toxic to my well being; DONE…
Moving into 2017 with improved health, renewed energy, and a positive charge…