Being a solitary witch can be difficult, especially if you don’t have other witches to talk to about the important things. I am a solitary. I have been a solitary for nearly 20 years. Being isolated from like-minded people is different from being solitary. For a long time, I was isolated and solitary. Being a solitary means you don’t have a group to practice with and most of your practices are done alone. Being isolated is something else entirely. It can leave you feeling very much alone.
As a solitary, you likely have other like-minded people to share your experiences with and discuss the secret witchy stuff that you can’t share with the world. It can be difficult to find others who are like-minded especially if you don’t know where to look. I am finding it increasingly difficult to find groups that are there as a community of support. However, supportive groups are out there.
I find that many witches are empathic. To me, Empathy is a very natural part of being a human being. It is just the way we are. Not being Empathic doesn’t seem normal to me at all. Being emotional doesn’t make one empathic but it is human to have feelings. Being aware of others feelings and “being able to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes” that to me is empathy. Being an Empath is not merely being capable of imagining what it is like to walk in someone else’s shoes but rather experiencing the emotion with them but again in an indescribable way. I am personally affected by the feelings and emotional experiences of others as well as my own independent emotions.
When I am going through my own emotional tidal waves, this experience with others can be completely overwhelming. It isn’t a problem all the time but when someone else is having an intense emotional experience near me, I am definitely affected. Being around others who go through emotional turbulence can be quite exhausting for Empaths when our shield is unpracticed or not exercised frequently.
I have found that for me, emotions such as grief, sorrow, anger and other unpleasant emotions caused by things such as depression, pregnancy, puberty, menopause and significant loss is difficult for me regardless if my own or through empathy for another living being. Happy feelings are always welcomed and refreshing. Let’s face it; it is easier to feel good than it is to feel pain.
Empaths can channel their energy of emotions without even thinking about it. Being an Empath around other Empaths can have a profound effect on each Empath present. I can’t even imagine what it is like not to be able to feel Empathy although I am told many don’t understand what it is like to experience it. I have been teased and ridiculed for not only having my own feelings but for being aware of the feelings of others. Compassion is seen as a sign of weakness in many circles. It is insane that I can tell when someone is “faking” an emotional response to someone who is actually “feeling it”. The best actors actually “feel” the emotion that they are trying to portray and that is when a movie really gets me. When a convincing actor is pretending or acting, they often invoke that emotion from a memory and even an Empath can be deceived.
Being an Empath is not the same as being a Psychic. Being a Psychic is a power that is found on shows like Ripley’s Believe It Or Not and True or False. I personally don’t believe in being Psychic but I am accepting of intuition or that gut feeling. The power of the subconscious in acquiring information even when we aren’t aware of it. Cold reading can be done naturally. Being a Medium is a step up on the believable scale but empathy is more commonly experienced than the actual Psychic stuff. Being a Clare or having a gift of one of the five Clares is also believable depending on how they are defined.
The question is whether or not Empathy a gift? Or maybe just a part of what makes us human? Or maybe it is what makes us a different type of human. I used to try to hide these hidden facts about me. I have gotten so good at hiding my emotional experiences that I have been compared to the imaginary Vulcan from star Trek. I am assumed to be all logic with complete control of my emotions when in reality; I frequently excuse myself from the situation so that I can release and regroup. When I can’t excuse myself from the situation, I have to use a grounding technique.
I used to find it difficult to be the pillar of strength when I couldn’t step away from the feelings of the person needing that strength. Hugging someone who is crying and being a blubbering friend and falling apart with them is not always what others need. They need someone who is not emotionally attached to the situation. Their situation not yours. It is important to be able to step outside the situation and provide another point of view from the perspective of someone who understands how that person feels and that is where compassion comes in.
Being able to detach not only from other people’s feelings but being able to detach, at least for a moment, from our own emotional situations long enough to be our own support is necessary. For an Empath, this can be a giant step forward and demands a lot of inner strength. If it doesn’t take work to detach, it is not a sign of strength. It is a sign that you are not an Empath.
Empaths see “being Empathic” differently than others. It is something that either makes us feel different or makes us feel weak, or we accept it as a bittersweet gift. It can be a gift much like being a Clairvoyant. I believe that it doesn’t matter what label it fits under. It is what it is. It is part of who we are and it is ok to be one. But as with any gift or talent, it must be exercised, worked with and controlled. It is part of us and the only thing we have any control over is ourselves and that includes how we respond to emotions.
I don’t mean we need to control it by blocking it. I mean we need to control it in a way that it doesn’t overwhelm us and destroy us. It would suck if we were a fire starter who is consumed by our own flames. It is the same for an Empath. It sucks to be an Empath who is consumed by our own emotions.
Just as anything we experience as a human being we have to learn how to deal with what we experience. The best way to do that is to talk to others who have experienced it. Not feeling alone means that you feel like others understand you and feeling like you belong in a group who is at least similar to you.
Human beings are so detached or at least feel isolated in a way that they are searching every label to see which group they fit in with. Sometimes they create a mentality or adapt a mentality to feel like they belong somewhere.
I am learning that I don’t have to fit in or belong. I am learning that it is okay to be me, however, I define me. I don’t need to be defined by something or someone else. I don’t need to fit into someone else’s label or someone else’s group. I am learning to just be me and if people don’t like me, I am fine being alone. I don’t want to be alone but I am okay with being alone. As long as I like who I am, I can always enjoy my own company.
On the same hand, I want to be able to handle others being themselves too. It is extremely important to be able to deal with others with as much understanding and skill as we want others to do for us. It is important to realize that we as Empaths have an obligation to look at people through eyes of love. Emotions are just that, emotions. They are powerful and yes we are affected. It is important to realize that we as Empaths are far more capable of understanding where someone is coming from because we feel what they feel.
Being an Empath is an opportunity to see a situation from someone else’s point of view. Heck being able to see it from our point of view and several other points of view. Practice builds skill and learning comes from absorbing information from where ever we can find it even if we experience the world through our emotions.
If you are an Empath, you have a unique opportunity. It is an opportunity that not everyone has. Couple that with compassion and inner strength and you will find that you have a greater understanding than most and that gives you an advantage.
I dedicate this post to all the Empathic Witches out there trying to find their place with like-minded people.
This is so on point! Its as if you honestly read my mind,then wrote an article. You did an epically awesome job with these subjects,both being solitary and empathic! I bow in honor to you, may your yule be great! Brightest blessings to you and yours!
Thank you! May your Yule be just as bright. <3
Today was my first visit here, and yours was the first article I read.. thank you Summer, you don’t know how much this helped me..
🙂 I am very glad that it touched you in a positive way. <3
Today is the first time I’ve been to the website and your article caught my attention right off bat. I know without a doubt that I am an empath, Im 37 years old, but never noticed it until my brother in law passed away tragically and unexpectedly in 2015. It was a very traumatizing experience for the family especially my sister (his wife and mate of 19 years) and myself as he was in my eyes the brother I never had. We were exposed to things that in my opinion no one should ever have to endure. She had a psychotic break, and was diagnosed with PTSD, and I was left to care for 6 children, pick his casket, write his obituary, and plan his funeral all while making sure I held her up and didn’t let her down. I was never able to actually grieve his death. It seemed like overnight everything changed for me. I began to withdraw from everyone because their rage, sadness, anxiety, fear and/or general negativity suddenly became almost palpable to me. I feel like a sponge of sorts. Whether it’s positive or negative emotion, I seem to absorb it and ALOT of times it simply consumes me. I too am a solitary witch (very new) practicing mainly with herbal and crystal magic. This too has just happened since his death. I can also sense malevolent energies and spirits as well as well as being somewhat clairsentient I don’t know how I know these things they just come to me and it’s never wrong. Frankly it scares the hell out of me as I have no idea what is happening to me. My question is can all of this be brought on by trauma/tragedy? What steps can I take to ease my mind and learn? Does it ever get better?
I will answer your questions the best I can. I personally believe that yes, for many people these gifts are created through trauma/Tragedy. I believe that one of the first steps in handling these new abilities is to figure out where you want to begin. For everyone it is different. I began by learning all I can about these subjects that affected me the most. I found that in doing this, I was inevitably brought onto a path toward healing. I have found that many people who have these gifts have experienced a lot of trauma. I can’t explain how it all works considering the mind is a powerful thing. With trauma, hypervigilance often ensues and I believe that for some this is the gateway that is opened and a bridge is formed. We become more aware of these things that people are not necessarily aware of. For those who experienced Trauma very young, their neural pathways were formed differently and therefore their experiences with certain gifts may have been triggered when they were indeed very young. That is my hypothesis anyway. I recommend for anyone who has experienced trauma, it is always good to seek help from the best resources available including psychotherapy or counseling for the psychological effects of trauma.
I just created a facebook page that I plan to use on my own healing journey. You are welcome to come along and like or follow my new page. tkay Houston healing Journey
Thank you for taking the time to respond. It gives me hope. 🙂
🙂 Always welcome…
In Love and Light
This atricle spoke to me SO much! Thank you for sharing this Summer! As an Empath I do find it difficult a lot of times to deal with the feelings of being overwhelmed by emotions, do you have any tips and grounding techniques you can share with us? I hope you have an amazing 2017! Can’t wait to read more from you!
There are many different grounding techniques that can be used. Discovering which one works for you is the key. counselors can generally point you in the right direction but you can get some different ideas online as well. Here is an article I wrote that gives a little bit of one way that I began. Here is the first technique I used to practice meditation, grounding, and energy at once. Working with Energy I still use this one from time to time. I have tried different techniques since. I began by working on learning how to meditate while working with energy which for me was very grounding. Becoming connected to what is around you. I also use a stone. For me, Tiger’s eye works well. I have written several articles in the past on grounding and working with energy. Even some relaxation techniques can be helpful when you are having difficulty with anxiety.
Recently my empathic abilities have been blocked. I’m not able to get energy past my throat chakra. Do you know what might be causing it and how I may fix the problem? I go to college and for the past month anytime I’ve been on campus I’ve felt like I was being drained.
Hi, With a general understanding of the Chakras as being energy centers. they can be affected by events that cause an emotional upset such as stress, loss, and conflict. Empathy is sort of both emotional and intuitive such as with the heart and third eye chakras but the effects can be more centered on other chakras that affect the rest of the chakras. They are all connected.
You mentioned college so I am going to go out on a limb and attach stress to the founding cause in relation to your empathic abilities being blocked. If we take a look at the Base/Root Chakra seems like it is being affected because you mentioned feeling drained on campus. When I was in college, I found it to be stressful because of all the things that are in the background such as the worry about grades and needing to do well, the teaching style is a bit different from high school leaving me to struggle with that adjustment as I had to figure out the best way to get the most out of my classes, not to mention trying to have any kind of social life such as the social obligations with family and friends including the social environment in college. As we travel up the chakras from the base we come all the way up to the Solar Plexus chakra that is affected by the base chakra and leaving you feeling a little lethargic feeling or like you can’t gain good clarity. Almost like walking around in a fog. Going up the energy centers to the Throat Chakra where the blockage is really noticeable is not really the foundation of the issue it is simply the most noticeable out of the affected Chakras. Although it is important to work on balancing and clearing all 7 of the main Chakras it is necessary to determine the blocked ones. The Throat Chakra we see a blockage in communication or an over-talkative result because it is out of balance. I find this particularly true for a blockage in communication while being uncertain.
There are some things you can do. #1. You can seek out a healer or two that will help you in this matter. I recommend Reiki or Tapping and you can find a couple of these on our Witch Resources list under Services. I like both of these options for working with energy healing. Both can be over distance. I particularly find Tapping to be the easiest method and compliments Crystal healing and Reiki.
One of the things you can do on your own is to work on these points through using some meditative processes to enter a slight yet conscious altered state that will allow you to feel relaxed and focused on the task at hand. Starting with the base chakra and going up, use the art of visualization to clear and balance your chakras. I do this by visualizing my chakra point that I am focused on at that moment open and close like the rhythm of the heartbeat. As it is open even if it takes a bit of concentration open it up and allow the contents to be released like a vapor, pull it out like a physical mass of gunk or flush it out with positive energy from your center. I use my hands because the meridians in your hands are a good energy source for directing your energy. When this is done and you can easily visualize the chakra open and close in rhythm like the heartbeat at rest you can visualize this line of energy going to the next chakra up in the line. Do the same with each chakra. For this instance, it may be beneficial to focus on the Root, Solar Plexus, and Throat Chakras. Some people do this step then follow with an aura sealing and some start out with an aura or energy cleansing. Once you have successfully cleared and balanced your Chakras you may feel a sense of clarity, groundedness and your empathic abilities will begin to return to its normal function. Also, keep in mind that chakras that our “clogged” or “out of balance” will affect other Chakras and can sort of throw them out of rhythm since one affects the other. For helping you at school, it may help to work on grounding and working a shield around you may help to keep you from being thrown off as easily. I mean grounding your energy, your Root Chakra as you arrive on campus. This can happen as you arrive at work, school or any new situation where you are unsure of what to expect or that will be a bit stressful. I absolutely love the Reiki Healers I see and the tapping techniques I’ve tried. Clearing and Balancing your Chakras is a basic energy hygiene that helps in the maintenance. I recommend seeing an energy healer that will focus on these energy points. I see a Reiki Master and I have tried tapping although I don’t recall what the actual term is for it.
It may help to have a counselor to talk to about how you are feeling about this particular college and work on some good coping skills to alleviate some of the stress you may be under. The holidays are coming. Take time to regenerate and refresh as often as you need. Do things that are physically active, socially satisfying and will change the focus of your thoughts for a while to give you a break from the analytical side of thought and onto the more entertainment and creative side of thought. I hope this is helpful.